January 2025

Here comes January. I was filled with anxiety at the beginning of January as I will be setting off soon for another one of my adventures in South East Asia. South East Asia is a place that I am not very fond of and a place I feel uncomfortable even talking about it even though it has been a place I grew up in and called home for the past 19 years since my departure from quite an interesting life in England.

I grew up thinking I belong somewhere else and as I started travelling far and wide later in life, I found out that I don't really belong anywhere though England was one of the place that I felt most at home in, when Mark and I lived for a period of time together during our married life in London and Wigan between year 2000 to year 2006, where I got to experience life in UK as a housewife as well as worked part-time in various nursing/care homes via a Care Agency in St. Helens. 

We had so many plans for our future together in UK but we separated in 2006 when I returned to Malaysia. It was traumatic for me to be separated from him and from a life in UK that I had got used to whilst living together with him. We got back in touch again in year 2008 and got reunited in Thailand and Cambodia in 2010. But, sadly, it was a brief reunion in a region that is so unsettling, chaotic and harsh. It was as if our reunion was doomed from the very beginning in a region that is so hostile, alien and exploitive.

In another few weeks time, I will hop onto a train in Malaysia and travel up north to Thailand - an overland train journey that I don't really look forward to. Would it be any different this time around? The scenery would still be the same, but, I guess the only difference is, I will be travelling on a much cheaper and a much more cramped carriage. Let's just hope that there would be adequate space for me to travel in comfort. Perhaps, just another one of my wishful thinking!

To find out more about my next journey in life, check out my monthly jottings or further updates via this website.

 

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February 2025

I met Mark again after our reunion and separation in November 2024. It was quite pleasant meeting him again in a pineapple farm in Cambodia. We had many interesting conversations on almost any topics under the sun. He kept on mentioning that he had to work for the future of a certain person from Asia - from a previous relationship with a local woman he met when we first arrived in Cambodia in 2010 - even though he had had not been well and penniless for quite a while. 

Asia can be extremely brutal and extremely exploitive and one needs to have a strong awareness in order to avoid being mistreated. One can easily get mistreated or abused by them if one is considered disadvantaged - e.g. not as "good" or as "rich" as them or not being liked by them for reasons best known to them.

One also oftentimes had to endure the too many extremely unnecessarily rude, chaotic, horrible encounters at workplaces or public places (as I had experienced too many times in the past) and one may take ages to recover from it. I had experienced the pain of being abused (whilst working for a pittance) while struggling financially, exploited, manipulated and felt all alone in the wilderness throughout the years I have been in Asia. It can be traumatic to be disadvantaged, victimised and bullied in Asia. One just needs to be brave and strong.

I think that Mark needs to take care of himself first since he is getting on in age. He was my soulmate (and forever will be my one and only soulmate) since we first met in London in 1999 though we separated many times since then due to one reason or another.

I felt very sad about our too many separations, that perhaps, could had been avoided, but I just have to get on with my life and focus on surviving my day to day life in this hot, tropical Asian region with people whom I barely have anything in common with.

Though I can speak some local Asian languages, I am most comfortable and most proficient in communicating via English language. Therefore, in many ways, English is a life saver, for I can read, write and reach out to native English speakers as well as communicate with non-native English speakers via English language.

It was quite a long journey for me, having to travel overland, starting from my hometown - Klang, Malaysia via Kuala Lumpur, Bangkok, and onwards to Cambodia - just to meet up with him again. I did not mind the long journey, since along the journey, I got to meet many interesting people from around the world. I met travellers from Brazil, Germany, France, USA, UK, etc. I felt so comforted that I was able to connect with many brave and adventurous people from around the world.

Check out for my next journey in life in March 2025 - though it would be much harder for me to share sad or upsetting events. It is upsetting for me to share my traumatic experiences in Asia. Therefore, I focus more on the positive aspects of my life. 

Perhaps, one day, I may feel opening up the wounds would lead to a better healing process for me.

 

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March 2025

Early March

I feel more optimistic as I plan to meet up with Mark again in two months time. I plan to get some snacks and some nutritious food for him. It will be nice to see him again in May 2025! Meanwhile, I will get back to Malaysia and work on my Wendy's Global English online project. I just hope more people will be interested in my project. I guess I will continue to work on it!

Late March

I continued to work on some parts of my Wendy's Global English website, revised some of the contents and redesigned some parts of the website. 

Since I will get back to travelling again in May - I started working on my next phase of my travel plans in SEA. That means more research and more decisions to be made. It can get a bit tiring when they are so few good, affordable or suitable accommodation options available and having to decide where to stay, etc.

I was also very pleased that I get to connect and chat with Mark via telegram - even though we are living apart at the moment.  We had a nice chat about the weather, a bit about our lives and so forth. It was great to see him in good spirits.

But the following day, Mark declined my call - though we managed to communicate via recorded messages (from him)and texted each other. I also felt a bit put off that he declined my call - and showed lacked of real interest for what I had to say with regard certain issues. I felt a bit upset about it. He also kept on harping about matters related to my dental imperfections - which was indirectly caused by the trauma of our separation -  which I think he needlessly reminded me too many times.

Cambodia changed him not for the better. I wish we never set foot there - a sad place that caused so much sadness to my already insecure and troubled life. We used to have a very special and loving relationship. But, now, it is all gone. I wanted so much to save our relationship and improve on our lives... I wanted so much to work on our marital relationship...

I am now undecided as to whether to cancel my SEA travel plans or to proceed with my travel plans to meet up with him again in Cambodia in May. Everything that happened there was too upsetting for me to even reflect on it. 

I will instead focus more on other aspects of my life as well as on my life's journey with Wendy's Global English when writing my journal entries from April onwards.

 

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April 2025

My profile photo on X has been changed again. I decided to change it back to the photo of a very old, lovely church - St Nonna's Church, which is located in a very pretty village in Altarnun, Cornwall, UK. I was staying at the nearby B&B in year 2022, when I took the picturesque photo of the church. It is really a lovely place.

I happened to discover this lovely place whilst I was looking for a suitable campsite. But I ended up staying at the B&B, which is located beside the lovely campsite where I had originally wanted to pitch a tent. Though I did not get to camp at the campsite, it was interesting meeting campers - some with their tents and some with their motorhomes camping at the lovely campsite.

I felt really sad when it was time for me to leave. Perhaps, one day, I may get to go back there again! 

Mid April - I started to include more details about myself and other details related to my Wendy's Global English project to my Wendy's Journal website as I plan to focus on developing my Wendy's Global English project via my Wendy's Journal website.

Hopefully, by end of this year, I can focus fully on blogging about my Wendy's Global English project via this journal. Still hopeful for my Wendy's Global English project starting soon.

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