January 2025

January has arrived, and with it came a wave of anxiety. Soon, I’ll be embarking on yet another adventure to South East Asia—a region that stirs a mix of emotions within me. Despite having spent 19 years of my life there and calling it home after leaving an eventful life in England, I find it challenging to feel at ease when discussing or revisiting this part of the world. It’s a place that carries both familiarity and discomfort for me.

Growing up, I always felt like I belonged somewhere else. As I began traveling extensively later in life, I realized that I didn’t truly belong anywhere. However, England was one of the places where I felt most at home. Between 2000 and 2006, during my married life with Mark, we lived in London and Wigan. During that time, I experienced life in the UK both as a housewife and as a part-time worker in various nursing and care homes through a Care Agency in St. Helens. 

We had countless dreams for our future together in the UK, but our journey took a heartbreaking turn when we parted ways in 2006, and I had to return to Malaysia due to my inability to renew my visa before expiry and before the loss of my passport. The separation was deeply traumatic—leaving him behind, along with the life I had grown accustomed to in the UK, felt like losing a part of myself.

Fate brought us back into each other’s lives in 2008, and in 2010, we reunited in Thailand and Cambodia. However, our time together was fleeting and bittersweet. The region, with its turbulence, chaos, and harsh realities, seemed to conspire against us. From the very start, it felt like our reunion was destined to falter in a place so unforgiving, foreign, and exploitative.

In just a few weeks, I'll be boarding a train in Malaysia, heading north to Thailand—a familiar overland journey that I can't say I’m particularly excited about. Will it feel any different this time? The scenery will likely remain unchanged, but the key difference is that I'll be traveling on a cheaper, more crowded carriage. Here’s hoping there’s enough space to make the trip at least somewhat comfortable. Wishful thinking, perhaps!

 

February 2025

I met Mark again after our reunion and separation in November 2024. It was quite pleasant and at the same time uncomfortable for me to meet him again in Cambodia. We had many interesting conversations on almost any topics under the sun. He kept on mentioning that he had to work for the future of a certain person from Asia - from a previous relationship with a local woman he met when we first arrived in Asia in 2010 - even though he had had not been well and penniless for quite a while. 

Asia can be extremely brutal and extremely exploitive and one needs to have a strong awareness in order to avoid being mistreated. One can easily get mistreated or abused by them if one is considered disadvantaged - e.g. not as "good" or as "rich" as them or not being liked by them for reasons best known to them.

One also oftentimes had to endure the too many extremely unnecessarily rude, chaotic, horrible encounters at workplaces or public places (as I had experienced too many times in the past) and one may take ages to recover from it. I had experienced the pain of being abused (whilst working for a pittance) while struggling financially, exploited, manipulated and felt all alone in the wilderness throughout the years I have been in Asia. It can be traumatic to be disadvantaged, victimised and bullied in Asia. One just needs to be brave and strong.

Mark needs to prioritise his well-being, especially as he is getting on in age. He was my soulmate and forever will always will be my one and only soulmate. Our journey together began in London back in 1999. Although life pulled us apart many times over the years for one reason or another. We managed to reconnect back again, after a long spell of 14 years. We had been through many difficult circumstances.  

I traveled to Asia to visit him because I was genuinely concerned about him and our future together in the region. . 

There were moments when I felt his angry outbursts towards me were completely unwarranted, especially since I had always contributed my fair share to our travel expenses across Asia. That said, I don’t hold his anger against him—I recognise that I had my faults as well. Still, I had always tried my best to support him, whenever possible, including when he pursued his TESOL certification in Thailand in 2010.

The countless separations from him have been deeply painful and emotionally overwhelming for me. Yet, I know I must press on, finding a way to navigate my daily life in this hot and humid tropical Asian region, surrounded by people with whom I feel little connection.

While I can speak a few local Asian languages, I am most comfortable and proficient in English. It has been a true lifesaver, enabling me to read, write, and connect effortlessly with both native and non-native English speakers around the world.

The journey was long and challenging, taking me overland from my hometown of Klang, Malaysia, through Kuala Lumpur, Bangkok, and into Cambodia—just to see him again. Yet, I didn’t mind the distance. Along the way, I had the incredible opportunity to meet fascinating people from all corners of the world. Travelers from Brazil, Germany, France, the USA, the UK, and beyond crossed my path, each with their own inspiring stories. It was truly comforting and uplifting to connect with so many courageous and adventurous souls.

Join me in March 2025 as I embark on the next chapter of my life. While it’s challenging for me to open up about difficult or painful moments — especially the traumatic experiences I faced in Asia — I choose to focus on the brighter, more uplifting aspects of my journey. Let’s celebrate the positives together!

Perhaps, one day, I may feel opening up the wounds would lead to a better healing process for me.

 

March 2025

Early March

I'm feeling optimistic as I look forward to meeting Mark again in two months. I'm already planning to bring along some snacks and nutritious food for him—it's always nice to share thoughtful gestures. Seeing him again in May 2025 will be such a joy!

In the meantime, I'll return to Malaysia and focus on my Wendy's Global English online project. My hope is to attract more interest and encourage more people to engage with it. For now, I'll keep dedicating my energy and passion to making it grow!

Late March

With my travels resuming in May, I've started planning the next phase of my journey through Southeast Asia. This involves plenty of research and making important decisions along the way. It can be a bit exhausting, especially with the limited options for affordable, comfortable, and suitable accommodations. Deciding where to stay is always a challenge!

I was thrilled to connect with Mark via Telegram, even though we're currently living apart. We had a lovely chat about the weather, shared bits about our lives, and more. It was heartwarming to see him in such good spirits.

The following day, Mark chose not to answer my call. Instead, our communication was limited to his recorded messages and text exchanges. I couldn't shake the disappointment—it felt as though he wasn’t interested in hearing the concerns I wanted to share. 

Once, we shared something truly special—a bond built on love and understanding. But now, those days feel like a distant memory. I held on tightly to the hope of saving what we had, dreaming of rebuilding and repairing our marriage. Yet, that dream slipped further and further away. For 14 years, he chose not to contact me. While I was left all alone in one part of Asia, he began a relationship with someone else, even referring to her as his "wife" in another part of Asia. The pain of abandonment was overwhelming, and I fell into a deep depression. But I refused to let that define me. Slowly, I found my way out of the darkness and embarked on a new journey—one centered around TESOL studies. Delving into the world of teaching English reawakened a passion I had always carried. Studying the intricate and fascinating aspects of the English language felt like second nature to me, bringing new purpose and direction to my life.

 

April 2025

I've updated my profile photo on X once again. This time, I’ve brought back the image of the charming St Nonna's Church, a historic gem nestled in the picturesque village of Altarnun, Cornwall, UK. I captured this serene shot during my stay at a nearby B&B back in 2022. It’s truly a beautiful and unforgettable place.

I stumbled upon this charming spot while searching for a suitable campsite. Instead of camping, I ended up staying at the cozy B&B situated right next to the picturesque campsite I had initially planned to explore. Although I didn’t get the chance to pitch a tent, I enjoyed meeting the friendly campers—some staying in tents, others in motorhomes—soaking in the beauty of the delightful campsite.

I felt a deep sadness as I left, but my journey to find a place I could truly call home carried on.

In mid-April, I began adding more personal insights and details about my Wendy's Global English project to my Wendy's Journal website. This marks a deliberate step to enhance and develop the project through developing a separate section on my Wendy's Journal website.

By the end of this year, I aim to dedicate myself to blogging more about my Wendy's Global English project through this journal. I remain optimistic and excited about launching the project in the near future.

 

May 2025

May 5, 2025

Watching Simon from Unique Property Company host a virtual tour of a breathtaking factory-conversion apartment on his YouTube channel truly sparked my imagination. I began envisioning Mark and me back in London—a city I left over two decades ago. Would I ever return? I can’t say for sure. Maybe one day, Mark and I could find our way back—perhaps on a cruise ship, something I’ve never experienced before. For now, it’s just a dream, but who knows? Only time will reveal if it becomes reality.

In the meantime, I’ll continue developing my Wendy’s Global English project. There’s still a wealth of opportunities to explore and refine to ensure its success and viability. 

There are moments when I feel deeply confident about the immense potential of this project. I truly believe it could achieve remarkable global success. However, there are also times when doubts creep in, and I wonder if it will garner any interest or even take off. For now, I’ll give it a few more months and see how things unfold. xxx

May 6, 2025

Who would have thought that Stratford-Upon-Avon, the birthplace of Shakespeare, is also home to the charming Shakespaw Cat Café? Named as a playful nod to the legendary playwright, this cozy café has been beautifully detailed by Dani on her blog, Travelling Jezebel. Check it out at travellingjezebel.com!

I'll admit, visiting Shakespaw Cat Café—or any cat café for that matter—wasn’t something I ever thought I’d consider. However, it truly makes for an intriguing read, even for those who aren’t necessarily cat lovers.

Although I’m not particularly a fan of cats, I must admit that reading about them and admiring a cute kitty photo turned out to be quite intriguing. Plus, the menu featuring delightful treats like cat-shaped ‘Kitty Crumpets’ was an added charm!

Kudos to Dani for yet another beautifully crafted blog post!

May 7, 2025

Anyone intrigued by the topic of *English as a Global Language* should explore the insightful article by Richard Barker, last updated on April 3, 2024. You can find it on the History of English website at historyofenglish.com.

It delves into key questions that I look forward to discussing with participants during my Wendy's Global English sessions.

What is a Global Language?

Why is a Global Language Needed? 

Is a Global Language Necessarily "A Good Thing"? 

Is English a Global Language?

Is English Appropriate for a Global Language?

Participants might also be asked questions such as, "What is your favorite word in the English language?" 

"May" is my favourite word, and it’s probably the one I use most often in my Wendy's Journal.

We’ve officially entered the fifth month of the year, often celebrated as the final chapter of spring in the northern hemisphere. That’s right—it’s May! Surprisingly, though, May isn’t my favorite month. That title belongs to February, the month of my birthday.

Let me explain: "May" is my favourite word. It embodies the essence of possibility, hope, and optimism—offering a gentle reminder that even in uncertain times, positive outcomes are within reach.

For instance, may our dreams become reality!

For many, the word "may" carries a slightly more optimistic tone compared to "might." In fact, when undecided, using "may" often suggests a subtle lean towards a more positive outcome.

"May" is widely regarded as a more polite choice when requesting permission or making a suggestion. 

What’s your favorite word, and what makes it special to you? 

 

May 8, 2025

I came across a beautiful, short poem titled "The First of May" by Annette Wynne, featured on the Discover Poetry website (discoverpoetry.com).

Here we go!

The First of May - by Annette Wynne

If I could stay up late no doubt        

I'd catch the buds just bursting out;

And up from every hidden root

Would jump a tiny slender shoot;

I wonder how seeds learn the way,

They always know the very day

The pretty, happy first of May,

If I could stay up then, no doubt

                                                                                       I'd catch the buds just bursting out.                                                                                                                                                    

 

I love this poem for its vivid imagery, especially the phrase "buds bursting out," which beautifully symbolizes new growth and fresh beginnings in my life. It makes me envision witnessing the moment those buds unfurl, drawing me closer to the beauty and essence of nature.

 

May 9, 2025

Are you a native English speaker with a passion for sharing ideas and exploring diverse topics about the English language? 

Ever thought about how many generations ago your family started speaking English?

Or,

Are you a non-native English speaker? Do you still view yourself as an English learner, or have you reached a point where you confidently use the language with ease?

Do you consider yourself a lifelong learner? If yes, which stage below best represents where you are on your journey?

a) A lower-intermediate English speaker - capable of managing simple, day-to-day conversations comfortably. However, they may still be in the process of expanding their vocabulary and boosting their confidence in using the language.

b) Upper-intermediate English speaker – capable of confidently engaging in diverse conversations, articulating opinions clearly, presenting well-structured arguments, and employing a wide-ranging vocabulary with ease.

c) Advanced or Near-Native English Proficiency – exhibits exceptional fluency, enabling seamless communication with both native speakers and highly proficient non-native speakers. Regularly uses English as their primary language, often as a lingua franca, and actively seeks to enhance their knowledge of the language and its role in global communication.

 

May 11, 2025

Did you know that English ranks as the second most spoken language across Europe?

Austria (73%), Croatia (49%), Cyprus (49%), Denmark (86%), Finland (70%), Germany (56%), Greece (51%), Hungary (40%), Iceland (98%), Italy (35%), Malta (88%), Netherlands (93%), Norway (88%), Poland (32%), Portugal (27%), Russia (80%), Sweden (89%), Turkey (17%).

English is the most widely spoken second language in the countries mentioned above, with usage rates ranging from 17% to an impressive 98%. (Source: Express.co.uk, article: "The Second Most Spoken Language in Europe," published May 10, 2025).

 

May 12, 2025

Question: Is English my native language?

Answer: No, but I consider English my de facto native language, as I began my journey with it at a very young age—over fifty years ago.

The English language has always been a cornerstone of my life and remains an inseparable part of who I am. I feel truly fortunate to acquire the ability to communicate fluently with both native and non-native English speakers from around the world. It’s incredible to connect with people globally through English—an endlessly fascinating and universally captivating language!   

Three reasons why I’m not a native English speaker (even though I consider English my de facto "native" language).

Reason #1: I come from a predominantly Asian, non-native English-speaking background. Although I was exposed to English as a lingua franca from a young age—my parents primarily communicated with each other and with me in English—it was not my country of origin first language.

Reason #2: I have been learning English as a second language since childhood.

Reason #3: I don't speak with a native English accent.

In short, while English isn't my first language in my country of origin, I consider it my de facto "native" language.

Are you a native English speaker? If so, what’s the story behind it? If not, what’s your journey?

 

26 May 2025

What Drives Us to Explore the World?

Can you, or anyone else, answer this question?

It has always intrigued me why so many people find joy in venturing beyond the comforts of their everyday lives!

Do I truly enjoy spending hours on trains, vans, planes, and more, only to end up in an unfamiliar, unwelcoming, and strange place?

I prefer not to travel to destinations where English isn't widely spoken, the environment feels uncomfortable or unfamiliar, or places that push me too far out of my comfort zone. 

Many of us who travel to unfamiliar places often do so for a variety of reasons—seeking adventure, pursuing courage, searching for meaning, escaping life's challenges, breaking free from boredom, or exploring the possibilities of a better lifestyle. Whether driven by curiosity or a need for change, every journey carries its own unique purpose.

I believe traveling can be incredibly enriching for the soul, especially when we have the means to explore distant destinations. Beyond that, traveling might not always feel necessary—unless, of course, it's to visit loved ones or family who live far away.

Have you ever dreamed of traveling to distant destinations? Where have your adventures taken you so far? Which places make you feel most at home? And if you could choose, where would you settle down for good?

Ultimately, for many of us, traveling is about finding familiar places and communities where we can connect with like-minded individuals—people who share our values, ideals, and perspectives.

 

28 May 2025

Do you have a special someone in your life? Or perhaps children? I adore kids, even though I don’t have any of my own! 

I longed for a fulfilling family life with Mark in the UK - a dream that I will continue to work on till I achieve it - hopefully soon. Growing up, I often felt a sense of insecurity, a feeling that followed me into adulthood. I found myself constantly striving to survive and adapt in environments that were far removed from the life I had envisioned. 

 

29 May 2025

Do you believe it's healthier for humans to spend most of their time alone?

Or,

Do you believe having more friends enhances our lives as humans?

Or,

Do you believe having more acquaintances enriches our lives?

Or,

Do you believe that true happiness comes from spending forever with your one and only soulmate? If you've been following my blog, you already know that for me, my one and only Mark is, and always will be, my one true love.

 

JULY 2025

July 2025

I find myself unable to continue writing on my blog due to overwhelming sadness. Mark, the person I hold dearest and who means everything to me, has left me feeling utterly alone in a foreign and unfamiliar part of the world—here in Asia. I don’t blame him; he must have been deeply distressed, struggling to adapt to life in such a harsh culture. 

Returning to the tiny hut on the remote Cambodian farm—where I once camped with him, with my Decathlon camper bed—was heartbreaking. The hut and my camper bed was still there, unchanged, but he was gone. That moment shattered me, and the image of the empty hut lingers in my mind, refusing to fade. The last time we spoke was via Telegram on July 2, 2025, while I was checking into a hostel in Vientiane, Laos. Since then, I’ve been desperately retracing my steps, searching for him, and seeking answers. All I’m left with now is an overwhelming sadness that’s difficult to put into words.

All I ever wanted was to share a serene, loving life with him in a peaceful and welcoming place. Will our paths cross again, bringing us back together? Only time holds the answer. 

Right now, I can only hope that, wherever he may be, he reaches out to me again soon.

We've faced our share of disagreements and moments of frustration, but beneath it all, my love for him remains unwavering and as strong as ever.

I know, deep down, that our love for each other is real and unwavering. Yet, life’s unexpected twists and turns have often led us down separate paths during our journey together. The years between 2010 and 2024 marked the longest time we spent apart, and in his absence, I feel an unmistakable void.

When we got back together last year 2024, I was really glad I got to see him again to celebrate his birthday on the 9th November 2024. It was great seeing him again and sharing our lives together again. Will we get to share many more of our birthdays together? I really hope so and I look forward to sharing our older years together.

Perhaps one day, we’ll find ourselves reunited in the UK – the place where our journey began, where we fell in love, and where we first lived as husband and wife. Will we finally reclaim the family life we’ve worked so hard to build? 

July 19, 2025 - For those who have been following my blog and my journey with Mark, you may already know that we parted ways once again in Asia after reuniting there last year. Despite everything, I still hope to return to the UK to find him. I want him to know how deeply I still love him and how much I still long to be with him forever, no matter the challenges, struggles, or frustrations we’ve faced while trying to build a life together. I think we need to stop quarrelling and loving each other more when we meet again, hopefully soon. 

July 28, 2025 - I never imagined Mark and I would be separated again after our magical reunion in Asia in November 2024. Despite the challenges and frustrations we faced during that time, my love for him has never wavered. It’s this unwavering love that drives me to return to the UK, hoping to find him and care for him once more.

Being together with him has always been the sole purpose of my life especially ever since I got married to him more than 20 years ago. We married on 30th July 2001 in a simple civil registry marriage in Malaysia - witnessed by two strangers. 

The fact that he traveled all the way from the UK to marry me in Malaysia was incredibly touching. It filled my heart with hope and a promise of a lifetime of togetherness with him. 

He brings joy, meaning, and purpose to my life. Together, we share our journey, supporting each other through every challenge, building a bond that feels truly unbreakable. We are each other's home, and my deepest desire is to always be by his side.

Despite the uncertainties ahead, I have decided to return to the UK. This journey requires sacrifice, including dipping into my savings, but it's a step I'm willing to take in order to seek him. Hopefully, he is safe and well in UK.

July 30, 2025

I just realised that today, July 30, 2025, marks 24 years since I married Mark! Although we are currently apart, I remain hopeful about mending our one-of-a-kind marriage, which has weathered so many challenges and painful separations.

 

August 2025

August 1, 2025

I’ve been exploring part-time online teaching opportunities and came across Twenix. It seems like a great short-term option to find online teaching jobs while I prepare for my return to the UK in ten weeks. 

My top priority at the moment is reconnecting with Mark in the UK. However, I’m also eager to explore potential job opportunities there.

With my Wendy's Global English project on hold until next year, I’m excited to shift my focus toward plans to return to the UK, reconnect with Mark, and explore new business and career opportunities that may align with my goals.

Ever since my traumatic separation from Mark a few weeks ago in Cambodia, I've been focused on planning my journey back to the UK to find him. The trip from Malaysia to the UK will be long and challenging, but my determination to reconnect with him outweighs any hardship or any difficulty that I may have to encounter in order to get back to him.

I am hoping to return to the UK by mid-October, driven by the hope of finding him and reestablishing our connection. While I know he is perfectly capable of taking care of himself, I deeply want to be by his side again.

Being able to once again share more adventures and create more memories together with him in UK would make me feel fulfilled again. 

I eagerly await the day we reunite in the UK. Despite being unable to contact him right now, I choose to remain optimistic. Turning this dream into a beautiful reality is something I deeply cherish and look forward to with all my heart.

Seeing him again will fill my life with joy once more.

xxxxx

August 2, 2025

Regular readers of my blog may already know that my decision to return to the UK stems largely from my longing to reconnect with Mark. However, this journey is not just about rekindling a relationship; it’s also about revisiting the places that once felt like home.

Blackpool, Wigan, St Helens, and Liverpool—each of these towns has been a cherished home at various points in my life. They hold a treasure trove of memories that I deeply value. I can’t wait to visit them again, especially as I hope to reconnect with Mark during my journey. 

xxxxx

August 3, 2025

Another Sunday passes, and once again, I find myself alone—without Mark by my side. Some of my fondest memories are the conversations we shared, even when we didn’t see eye to eye. Those moments meant so much to me, and I can only hope we’ll have many more meaningful discussions when we hopefully reconnect again in UK.  

I can hardly put into words the deep sadness I feel whenever I'm apart from Mark—a profound loneliness that defies description. Being separated has been incredibly painful for both of us, especially during our time in Asia, where life's challenges seemed to conspire to pull us even further apart.

xxxxx

August 5, 2025

There are so many uncertainties that I have to put up with as I plan for my travel back to UK. Will I get to have another reunion with Mark in UK?  The numerous separations from him has taken a toll on me. Many a times I just feel numb with pain.  Another challenge that weighs heavily on my mind is the uncertainty surrounding the logistics of the journey itself. From securing the right travel documents to navigating the many travel related challenges, the process feels overwhelming and exhausting. Each step presents a new hurdle, and the fear of unexpected delays or complications adds to the emotional strain I am already experiencing. Yet, I hold onto the hope that this journey will bring me closer to the peace and connection I so desperately seek.

xxxxx

August 14, 2025

It is almost definite now that I will be returning to UK this coming October 2025. I wanted so much to see Mark again and also I wanted to get back to working as a carer again. Therefore, I decided to get back to studying again to prepare for my return to healthcare related work. I look forward towards doing something really meaningful again as well as working towards a more secure future. Another key reason for my decision to return is the sense of personal growth and fulfillment I believe this journey will bring. Moving back to the UK is not only about resuming my career but also reconnecting with the community and culture that I hold so close to my heart. I am excited about the prospect of meeting new people, building new friendships, and contributing positively to the lives of those around me. These experiences will undoubtedly enrich my perspective and help me grow both personally and professionally.

Alongside my professional goals, I am also looking forward to reconnecting with the vibrant and diverse culture of the UK. From its rich history to its bustling cities and picturesque countryside, there’s so much I’ve missed about the lifestyle there. Whether it’s walking through charming local markets, enjoying quiet afternoons in cozy cafés, or simply being part of the community once again, I’m eager to embrace everything that makes the UK feel like home.

xxxxx